Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Testing of our Faith

I have much to blog about, but haven't had the heart.  A precious young man in our church family died Sunday from an aggressive cancer that he has fought for the last two years.  We all rejoice with him that he is now healed and in the presence of the Lord, but we grieve the loss of him.  We grieve for his parents, his sister, his grandparents, his nephew, and his many cousins, family, and close friends. 

Why does this catch me off guard?  Why is it that even after doctors have given up hope for a recovery, we persist to believe the Lord will heal him?  We know He is able and we know He desires to bring glory to Himself.  It seems to us that it would bring the most glory to God if He would perform a miraculous healing such that no doctor or bystander could doubt the great power of our Lord.  I have no answer as to why God chose to take Connor home now rather than to give him an extended stay here on earth.  Sometimes I think the timeline of earthly events when viewed by God is seen from such a perspective that it's more of a dot than a line. One thousand years, thirty years, one day.  They are the same with Him. 

But that isn't accurate.  We aren't ants and God doesn't see us as such. He cares intimately for us and sympathizes with our weaknesses.  We have examples in Scripture of His tender sensitivity to our perspective of time like when He gave Hezekiah an extra 15 years of life in answer to his pleas for healing.  And of course, those of us who know the Lord have all personally experienced His undeserved grace in the circimstances of our own lives.  Which brings me back to my perplexity.  I can't understand it- why physical healing sometimes and not other times.  I know God is good and that heaven is better, but it's hard to understand how it can be good for his family to have to live the rest of their lives without their son.  It is this lack of understanding that tests my faith, our faith.

I'm grateful that the testing of our faith produces endurance.  We need endurance to make it in this life.  I'm also thankful that the Lord is merciful with us when we struggle to believe.  His mercies are new every morning.  Lord, I believe, help my unbelief. 

Connor with his mom and dad a couple of months ago.

Please pray for Connor's family and friends.  Pray the Lord's comfort for his mom and dad.  The funeral is Friday.  Connor was a very popular young man.  This will be a big funeral attended by many who don't know the Lord.  Please pray that God will continue working through Connor's testimony of unwaivering faith and that God's Word will prick the hearts of many young people who have never given a thought to eternity and where they will spend it.

Connor will be missed.

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I'm an on-the-run mom to 6 kids who studied and taught exercise science in a previous life. I love all things running, nutrition, and health-related. I usually run at zero dark thirty in the morning and am often quite hungry before, during, and after my run, but I live a rich, full, blessed life with my children, family, and friends. My faith in God is my anchor, and looking to Him and His promises allows me to live fully even when life circumstances are difficult. While running gives me an appetite, my desire is to hunger and thirst for righteousness more than for physical food.